Saturday, January 23, 2010

Yes Jace, I Lied

I once took an ethics class in college in which we read the book that our professor wrote, "Is Lying Sometimes the Right Thing to Do?" In this class we read real-life and hypothetical situations that would then lead us to have to answer this question. As a mother I have made up mind mind about this truly debatable question: yes, sometimes lying is the right thing to do.

Don't get me wrong, I tend to be a very honest person and strive my hardest to always tell the truth in my words and deeds, but I feel motherhood has given me some exceptions to the great commandment, Thou shalt not lie. One of these exceptions is when I lie to my five year old and tell him that he doesn't have to get shots, when indeed I am absolutely planning on making him get those darn shots.

I told Jace about two weeks before his 5 year check up that he would be going to the doctor and he would have to get shots so that he could go to kindergarten. I decided to tell him about the shots early so that there would be the possible chance of him warming up to the idea and hopefully not being scared to get them. Wrong move. That never happened.

After many tantrums and major melt downs, Bryan and I told him that he would just go for the check up and he wouldn't have to get shots. Thus the great lie comes into play. He accepted this, and he didn't mind the idea of going to the doctor if there weren't shots involved. Every time the appointment was mentioned he would ask, (actually declare), "I don't have to get shots," and he would repeat it over and over until we would agree with him. I knew that if we didn't lie to him, I wouldn't have even been able to get him into the doctor's office because he is one determined, stubborn, and LOUD child.

When we got to the doctor, I asked to speak to the doctor outside in the hall before he saw Jace. The doctor and I connived and agreed not to tell Jace that he was getting shots and we planned the best way to go about it. The great sneak attack was in place. After the exam, the doctor left and Bryan and I told Jace that the nurse had to come back in to check his legs. Jace happily jumped up on the table, we got his thighs exposed, and Bryan began to distract him with a great game of hiding his face under Lily's blanket. And then....POKE. Two shots in two legs by two nurses.

Screaming, that's what came next - lots of screaming with lots of angry words. He yelled both at me and the innocent nurse that was wrangled into the mess, "You're mean!!" as she left. He told me over and over that he was mad at me. And then, "You lied!! You said I didn't have to get shots."

That's when the guilt hit me. But just a hint.

Yes Son, I did lie to you. I lied to you because I'm your mother and it's my job to take care of you which means keeping you healthy which means making you get shots. So maybe it means that sometimes I am supposed to lie to you if it is in your best interest. And just know this Jace, there probably will be many other times that I lie to you. But I promise only if it's in your best interest. I'm sorry Son, that's just how it has to be.

Because lying sometimes is the right thing to do.

Especially when you're a mother.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Personal Updates

Here's a look into our lives and what is happening to each of us individually.

Jace has a one track mind these days and I hear this question WAY too much: "Mom, can I play the Wii?" He and Cole got a Wii for Christmas and they are loving it. Star Wars Legos is his favorite game to play. We love to watch both of them play the active games because it involves both of them jumping up and down the entire time - no matter what game they're playing. The games don't require jumping, that's just how they show their excitement. How can I deny them playing the Wii for a couple of hours when they are getting more exercise than me?

(Here's an action shot of them playing. Notice how red and sweaty Cole is.)

Also, something else on Jace's mind are his upcoming kindergarten shots. He has his appointment this Friday and already there have been multiple break downs about getting shots. Remember last time he got a shot? Ugly. I don't know how I'm even going to get him into the doctor's office on Friday. Your prayers will be greatly appreciated.

Cole. Oh that Cole. This child is something else. He has been quite the stinker lately. He is so naughty and then so adorable and sweet the next minute. He truly is too cute for his own good. He is all boy and is always playing with a gun, sword, wrestling, or hitting someone. Oh, and he is obsessed with my "booties" aka boobs. See? All boy I tell ya. He is so sweet and is always telling me, "I wanna hold you" which actually means, "I want you to hold me." And he tells me "I your Snuggle Bunny." He drives me crazy and yet melts my heart.

Lily is now three months old. She still seems pretty petite to me which I am grateful for because I can't handle her getting big. It's hard to see your third baby grow so fast. She has developed a few of things since she turned three months old:

1. Thumb sucking. I love it and dislike it at the same time. It's adorable, yet you can't throw away a thumb at 15 months old. She still does take her binkie, but she prefers her thumb.

2. Hair loss. She had so much hair for so long and then in about a matter of a week or two she lost SO MUCH HAIR. It saddens me. Deeply. And it's not just the back of her head, she has lost so much on top and on the sides too. Sigh.

3. CHUBBY cheeks. Need I say more?

Bryan is still staying busy looking for a job and also with his church responsibilities. With some of his down time he has picked up a new read, Twilight. I'm not saying he likes it, he's just interested to know what all the hype's about. It's been fun to talk about the book with him because he points out how silly it really is. He's not yet finished so we'll see what his final opinion is.

(This is a picture of him showing one of his Christmas presents. I thought he looked really cute in it.)

I am working on a resolution of becoming more organized and clutter free. I can't stand clutter and so my goal is to go through every closet and cupboard and dejunk and reorganize. Fun, huh? Bryan and I have found a new activity for date night: playing Star Wars Legos on the Wii. Shortly after we got it we played it together for 4 hours straight which kept us up until 1:45 am. I won't admit how many hours total we've played it together. Shameful. Who would have thought that me, out of all people, would get addicted to a video game?

And since I don't have a picture of myself, here's the kids in their Christmas outfits.

So that's a quick update on each of us and a few pictures to show it too.

Ringing in the New Year

As one of my resolutions for the 2010 year, I am resolving to be a better blogger. I use to do so well, and then the third pregnancy and third child came along, and the blogging thing dissipated quite a bit. But, I am vowing to change that. I need to do a better job of recording the happenings of our family and also I really want to jot some of the thoughts and ideas that float around in my head. So here's to a better blogging year....

I know that 2009 was a very difficult year for many people and families. The economy affected many people on many different levels, and every night as we knelt down together as a family and had family prayer, the thought didn't escape my mind that when so many were suffering with the loss of jobs and other trials, our family was very blessed.

Here are a few things that I was so grateful for in 2009:

Bryan's job was going well - we were employed when so many were not
We were settled in a beautiful home with a beautiful yard that we loved and worked hard in
We were blessed financially
Bryan was put into the bishopric which has brought added blessings
We had a beautiful, healthy, and happy baby girl
We were all healthy - broken bones!!

These blessings were reiterated in my mind that first Sunday of the month when many people stood to bear their testimonies of the hardships and trials they faced this past year and how it shaped their faith. Man, 2009 was a good year to our family.

And then the looming thought of: "If 2009 was such a good year for us, what will 2010 bring? Something's got to be coming."

We found out pretty quickly what 2010 was going to bring to our family. It brought to us what it brought to so many other people in 2009: unemployment.

On January 7, Bryan was quite surprisingly laid off. He knew that there were going to be changes in the company; sales territories and quota changes were coming but he wasn't too worried. Things were being shaken up a bit, but this? This was quite a shock. Neither one of us anticipated it.

Bryan has been home all day for only a couple of days, and it's been nice to have some lazy days with him and the boys. (Today is one of those days!) But for the most part he has been out of the house working at the real estate office updating his resume and job hunting. He needs to stay busy to keep his sanity and so far he's been doing a great job of keeping it together.

With this change, amazingly both of us have that calm peaceful reassurance that things will work out for the best. We don't know why this happened or for how long this will last, but we know that we're going to be just fine.

Faith is a comforting thing.