Lost in Translation

About 5 months ago, I posted about my love for the 18 months of perks. At the beginning of that post I wrote a disclaimer stating that I may come to regret what I had written. Well I can't say I "regret it", but perhaps I should have waited several more months to write it; because apparently sarcasm is lost in translation with The Man Upstairs.

You see, there was a line at the end of that post that said, "I'd get pregnant tomorrow just to not see her ugly face again." Well, I didn't get pregnant the very next day, just about exactly a month later.

Even while I was pregnant with Lily I always knew there was a number four waiting to join us, and I always wanted a number four. I just didn't want/expect them this close. Lily and this new one will be 20 months apart and it is kind of freaking me out. The other kids have been 26 and 30 months apart and the spacing has been wonderful. I was never worried going from 0 to 1 kid, 1 to 2, and 2 to 3 kids; but I am really worried about going from 3 to 4. I know there are many other situations out there that are closer and harder than mine, but I'm just sayin - these are my concerns.

And apparently Heavenly Father isn't the only one that has lost things in translation. Do you ever have those thoughts/premonitions that make you think, "This could be a possibility; a real possibility"?

When I would think about having Number 4, there was this little thought in the back of my mind (premonition, maybe) that this little baby could come sooner than later, meaning sooner than when we were planning on having them join our family. I had the thought that Lily and this baby would probably be closer than two years apart. Apparently this thought and my math calculations were lost in translation too because I didn't realize that I would have to be pregnant NOW (and four months ago for that matter). I think that maybe these thoughts/premonitions were Heavenly Father's way of warning me to prepare myself mentally for this.

But these thoughts were lost on me because I didn't prepare myself. I wasn't quite ready for the fact of being pregnant NOW. In fact, I was in denial for quite some time. I didn't even take a pregnancy test until I was three weeks late! I didn't make the pregnancy "public" until I was 15 weeks along - almost 16. I'm 19 weeks tomorrow. (Ever want a pregnancy to go by fast? Just don't tell anyone for 15 weeks. :)

Now that I have accepted the fact that Number 4 is joining our family in June, I am excited. I am excited to have another little newborn in our family. I love newborns. They are in every sense, Heaven. Pure Heaven. I am excited to have our family complete and to move on to our next adventures. Yes, there are going to be challenges and struggles and LOTS of changes (an entirely different post) with another one right now, but it will definitely be worth it. And I cannot wait to see if it is a boy or girl (although I really, REALLY think this one is a boy). Call it mother's intuition. I guess we'll find out for sure next Tuesday!!

So if you want to learn anything from my situation, I would say be careful what you ask or wish for and in the manner you wish for it. Because remember, sarcasm is lost in translation.

Oh, and in case you were wondering? Yes, the perky perks are back. And for that I am grateful.